Destination Reflection

Canaan Redeemed - Part II

2012-01-14T10:04:00.000-08:00

My littlest, newest cousin - now just 6 months old - is named "Cainen". But his father calls him Cain. When I first heart it I asked him to spell it. Immediately I said, well, I'm calling him "Cainen!" And that was before I'd met him.

Oh, then when I saw the little precious guy I knew right away. His big baby eyes were already "new-life-bright," but when he looked at me and our eyes locked, his grew even bigger - as if in recognition. Yep, if it hadn't have happened every time he looked at me I wouldn't have even said it was so. But indeed, his eyes and face would light up and he would grin with recognition.

I know baby Cainen recognized the light of the Lord and the Glory of God in me.

And when I saw him the first time, I recognized something in him also and I inadvertently pronounced a prophecy (that I didn't know was a prophecy), over his life and future.

As I grabbed his chunky little baby body into my arms and stared into his beautiful, bright eyes of recognition, I suddenly exclaimed, "Oh, look at you! You will be the one to bring redemption to Canaan!"

That was 3 weeks ago. And to be perfectly honest, I had forgotten all about the words of the Lord that I wrote down below until only just today. And most certainly if I had remembered the word of the Lord regarding President Barak Obama, I definitely did not remember that I'd entitled the blog "The redemption of Canaan!"

But upon reading it today - I write this new post as a part II that is entirely unrelated to the words in the first part.

In the book of Genesis, when Noah's son Ham sees his drunken nakedness and tells his brothers, Noah awakes and curses, not Ham, but his son Canaan. Noah's grandson's name was Canaan. And Noah was saying that the people - the descendants born from Canaan would serve his brother's people all their days. From Canaan came the Amalekites, and Hitites and all the other "ites" that the Hebrews had to purge from Canaan - the promised land - before they became Israelites.

Cainen is of mixed decent - African American and White/Spanish. And as we all thoroughly know, President Obama is African and White. While I believe that God's word to me about President Obama is that he will be instrumental in the redemption of Canaan in the nation, land and political/prophetic importance that it has in it's current existence today; little Cainen will grow to be a mighty man of valor, who will lead a generation of spiritual warriors who will bring redemption to the hearts, minds and souls of the people of Canaan as they currently exist today.

Before the Lord returns all peoples and all nations of every tongue under the heavens will have individual and collective opportunities for redemption.

Eve shall be redeemed. Canaan shall be redeemed. Egypt shall be redeemed.
Who else will be redeemed?

Will you?

Power, Love & Peace, ya'll -
~Min. Deidre Campbell-Jones

The Redemption of Canaan

2011-11-17T10:16:00.000-08:00

I've said it before and God said it to me again, "Do not worry for the things of the world," He said to me this morning.

"Do not worry for what you will see and for what you will hear," says the Lord in regard to the future of America, Israel, and the other nations connected to us. "Do not worry over what you will hear the media saying; what the politicians and leaders are saying, and even what the prophets and preachers are saying. For they see in part and prophecy in part." And I, as the maidservant of the Lord, only see in parts that seem to fill in the blanks of the parts of others.

The Lord God spoke to me this morning and told me yes, it's going to look bad - really bad. President Barak Obama must needs be - and the things of this world and the decisions he will seem to make must need be. The Lord God has said He will redeem Canaan through President Barak Obama. But it will look very bad before this is evident.

The preachers and prophets that see President Barak Obama signing against Israel in the guise of Peace are right in as much as they can see. The connections his critics try to make between the President and the Muslim nations must need be. "How can a people be moved if they feel have no connection to the one whom I (sayeth the Lord God Almighty), have chosen to move them? I will redeem Canaan and bring reconciliation to my lost and dispatched, dispised and rejected sons and daughters through President Barak Obama. Not because he is a Muslim bent on destroying America (which he is not), nor because he is working on behalf of the plans of the devil to destroy Israel (which he - Obama - is not)."

The devil has no plans - he is part of a plan that he has already lost. And the role President Barak Obama will play are on the side of good and not evil, blessings and not cursings - life and not death. But it will not seem so. Up until the very last it will not seem so. The media will report that President Barak Obama "has signed it" - and it will seem the worst fears of Christian and Jewish leaders for America and Israel have come to pass in favor of what Islam and Muslim leaders are fighting for.

"But the Holy Spirit will not be mocked and I, the Lord your God am not a man, that I should lie. What I have spoken, shall accomplish what I set it out to do, and I shall see My precious son Barak come into the fullness of My Spirit and My purpose for him, for America, for Israel and for Canaan. For I know the thoughts I have of you, thoughts of good and not evil to give you an expected end."

What the prophets, preachers, teachers, political leaders and media spin-doctors expect - and what they shall see, and what they shall report are not of Me, sayeth the Lord our God. "For my ways are not your ways, my thoughts are not your thoughts. Lean NOT unto your own understanding!" commands the Lord our God.

When it comes to the seeming end, you will think the Lord God has forsaken America and Israel. "You will think My Word as void. Jesus, My Word and My Glory, will prevail and has prevailed. Canaan has been redeemed just as Israel has been blessed. The temple plans have been laid for its rebuilding. Isreal and all the seed of Abraham have been promised to receive vineyards they did not plant and houses they did not build. Do not suppose your partial vision and partial understanding is all of Me - if any man think He is a prophet I, the Lord your God will reveal myself to him in dreams and in visions, but I show in part and reveal in part, that you may see in part and prophecy in part. But I will not move upon the Earth without first revealing my secrets unto the hearts of man."

America has a prominent prophetic role in the history of this world's future. But many cannot see this nation written in the pages of God's word. But just as Israel is scattered and fractured, yet spoken of as a whole, so is America one, but you will find her spoken of in the pages of God's word as scattered and fractured - parts of separate wholes.

Israel is blessed and has been from the dawn of the age. America is blessed, for the prayers of her citizens were heard before the formation of the heavens and the earth. "And make no mistake," sayeth the Lord our God, "President Barak Hussein Obama is a child of God - a most precious child of God - chosen, ordained, consecrated and highly anointed for such a time as this and for this purpose and unto the utmost Glory of the Most High God! Do not mess with Mine anointed! For My Kingdom is come. My will is done, on Earth, just as it is in Heaven."

Let all who have an ear to hear, let them hear. Amen.

Power, Love & Peace - ya'll
~Min. Deidre Campbell-Jones

The Redemption of Eve

2011-10-19T14:52:00.000-07:00

For a while now - perhaps about 10 months - I've been hearing about "women".

I have heard messages about women.
I have heard prophecies about women.
I have received prophecies specific to my "womanhood".

Then yesterday morning God spoke to my Spirit and mentioned in His message to me that, "...it must need be unto me, as a woman, as a lioness whom He has raised up, to do that which He has purposed me to do."

And then last night, while teaching, a student asked me a question regarding scripture that I almost couldn't answer because of a partial revelation about women!

Genesis 3:15 "And I [God] will put enmity between thee [the serpent] and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel." This is the scripture the student asked me about. Generally he just wanted the basic meaning. But I got stuck on the first part of the scripture - that God would put enmity between the woman and the serpent... yes between her seed and his seed, but specifically the "woman."

God didn't say He'd put enmity between the serpent and man (meaning mankind), He said "woman". And since the consequences of sin in the Garden pertain to all mankind, male and female, for all time, until Jesus returns, so does this comment to the serpent.

Any consequence to Adam pertains to all men.
Any consequence to Eve (who at that time was only referred to as "the woman" or Adam's "wife") pertains to all women. Therefore, God's comment to the serpent regarding enmity between him and "the woman" pertains to enmity between all women.

It just seemed highly significant to me, that women would be singled out. Because, once God said, "and between your seed and her seed," He then covers all mankind who are Believers - both male and female.

I was in the process of teaching to the class that through the remission of our sins, (Matthew 26:28) the shed blood of Jesus remitted us from sin of the Garden and all its consequences. Not only are we redeemed from the law, but we are also redeemed from all consequences of sin - if we know and acknowledge and repent.

Therefore, I told the student that I believe women will be redeemed before men, in the End-Times from the "curse" of their consequence in the garden. I told him this was my belief without proof... yet. He did then show me a blurb from his study bible which said generally the same thing.

Wow. Ok - I just accepted that as confirmation. Not only to my opinion, but also to all the prophecies and messages I'd heard about women and had received specifically as a woman.

THEN: Here's what God showed me and revealed to me in a vision last night while going to sleep. Women will most definitely be instrumental in the End-Times and the ushering in of the New Millennium. Think of it as God restoring "balance to the force" to coin an old Star Wars phrase.

Let me refer to these goings on in terms of "Old Eve" and "New Esthers," just as there was "First Adam" and the "Last Adam" - Jesus.

Old Eve brought about the "demise" of this first Earth.
New Esthers will bring about the rise of the New Earth - meaning: circumstances in the End Times that will facilitate and give rise to the prophetic necessities just prior to the coming of Christ.

The first man was given the task to replenish and subdue the earth.
Men in the End Times will contribute to the demise and destruction of the earth. Now, I'm not saying that there's going to be some cataclysmic Armageddon and earth will cease to exist and all mankind will die. No, but through the persecution and destruction, systems crumbling, wars and rumors of wars, devastation and trials, it may feel like it. And many may even wish for it. Men will be the principle driving force in these circumstances.

Women are attributed with introducing death into mankind through Old Eve.
Men will be attributed with the death of mankind and New Esthers will usher in new life - everlasting life; Kingdom living and the Tree of Life. Where Old Eve was deemed as "the mother of all living", the New Esthers will be resurrected and redeemed as the "mothers of all living - eternally."

Not only will women be instrumental in the End Times, but New Esthers will be ushering in the Glory of God to mankind, where Old Eve had initiated mankind's separation from the Glory of God.

In case you didn't know we ARE in the end of the End Times. Look around: New Esthers are being raised up all over the world for such a time as this. Not sure if you can see an Esther or if you will be an Esther?
Here's how to recognize US:

Esthers are orphans - either by faith, economic status, education, politics or denomination.
Esthers are the least considered, unknown, hidden, masked and undercover.
Esthers are chosen ONLY by the King of Kings - a woman promoted by mankind is no Esther
Esthers have a supernatural consecration, devotion, spiritual discipline and uncommon lifestyles
Esthers stand out as unique, different, odd - though smart, educated, beautiful, and/or talented
Esthers will step out in bleak, dark, horrific and hopeless times as a voice and an example
Esthers will be rags to riches stories and will quickly rise from least to most, poor to rich
Esthers may be isolated, with perhaps only one person/man as her covering or support
Esthers may seem to be overnight successes, with circumstances seemingly against them before
Esthers will (almost) single-handedly facilitate the deliverance of an entire people, nation or city
Esthers will be fierce spiritual warriors, with great enmity, against the powers of the enemy
Esthers will walk in the supernatural Glory of God as purposed from the First Dominion

Oh, Daughters of Jerusalem! Daughters of Zion! Arise and be counted! Be chosen amongst the chosen! And like the women present on the day of Pentecost - be baptized in the Spirit of the living God, and be who He has purposed you to be, with boldness, power, love and truth!

Power, love and peace, ya'll!
~Min. Dez

Words of Wisdom re: Prophecy

2011-10-17T11:19:00.000-07:00

God Himself has just given me words of truth, revelation and understanding about Prophecy, Words of Wisdom, Words of Knowledge and the people who receive them.

The Lord our God truly has "poured out His Spirit upon His sons and daughters. It is as if the Spirit of Truth, Wisdom, Knowledge and Understanding have been poured out like waters or vapors in the firmament and atmosphere. This "information" falls upon us all, however it is those who are the Lord's sons and daughters, those who desire the gift of prophecy, those who are called to the office of Prophet and those who are sensitive to the supernatural who will "perceive" what they (we) are receiving through prophecy, word, visions and/or dreams.
We see in part and we know in part - but all parts are of Truth. Often we try to "reconcile" that which we may perceive as conflicting prophecies. I have even heard individuals "argue" (passionately discuss) why "their" word was more accurate, or cancels out or will come to pass over and/or instead of another's. But the truth is, all Truth is of God, and God's word spoken, will come to pass no matter who receives which part of that truth.
We receive Truth according to how we perceive truth. Truth is measured out with the same measure with which we measure it! If one person's call or temperament or personality lies in rules and regulations or rights and wrongs, then they will receive a Word and deliver the portion of that Word according to that perspective. Crazy as it seems, we must "consider the source" when we receive a Word - not to discount that Word, but to piece together all related Words in their proper place and perspective like a puzzle. A hard worker will receive a Word and deliver that word from the perspective of what you should do in order to accomplish that word. A person who doesn't like change may receive and deliver that same Word wrapped in a message of waiting instead of doing - and therein lies the conflict. But if you "do" the Word of the one, and "wait" for the Word to manifest, then you have received both prophets as a prophet and all will receive the prophet's reward.
God has only the BEST in mind for you and planned for you. His prophetic truth is from those plans! If someone has a prophecy that is not for your best, for your good or for God's plan for you, then it is a prophe-lie! Now, yes, there are Words of Wisdom or Knowledge that can warn you of impending danger, but those generally come with a way out. A warning has two parts: stop (the command), or you will get hurt (the impending danger). A prophecy is specifically a description of what will come to pass according to God's will, purpose or sovereignty. And God is Good! Any "prophecy" that describes, il-will, or a purpose separate from God's or that which is unrighteous towards His sovereignty is NOT of God. That prophet is in danger of bringing damnation to themselves, and your spirit will always bear witness to the Spirit of God. Your spirit will tell you when a "word" is a lie because the Truth lies in you, and therefore a prophe-lie will not be a danger to you.
Unforgiveness, bitterness, covetousness, jealousy, legalism and condemnation - even sins, can cause a believer to receive a Word inaccurately, and deliver that Word inappropriately. Beware of a word given in a spirit of derision, condemnation, anger or contempt. That word may be based on some portion of truth, but the believer's own nature will distort what they hear, or think they hear and they will deliver it from that perspective. God will not honor a word given from the flesh of man's heart - only the truth that comes from His heart. Say for example you are out of work, and qualified in a specialized field in which it is difficult to acquire the job you have been praying for. A friend who is working a no-where job, out of the will of God for his own life and suffering for it, receives a word about your career, but it is distorted because of his own jealousy and dissatisfaction. So he tells you, "yeah well, your time in "cubical hell" is coming. You're getting that job, but be careful what you ask for." Your spirit cringes from this word - you can't even hear the good news that the job is yours, and you begin to doubt whether you want this job or not. This is the spirit of unrighteousness in one individual trying to infect your God-given purpose with the spirit of unrighteousness and doubt as well.
Doubt cancels faith; faith fuels your word. If God speaks a word and you receive that word, it will come to pass. But as always, we hold the power to our own life and our own death. Only we can choose not to receive the power, dominion, authority and purpose for which God created us to have - just like Adam and Eve - nothing has changed. Just because God has spoken a Word for you, doesn't mean it will come to pass no matter what IF you do not receive that it will come to pass. Your doubt or disbelief will cancel the faith necessary to manifest your Word. "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen." Hebrews 11:1 Without faith, that which you are hoping for cannot come to fruition. But doubt is like a counter-balance. You can have faith in God, but doubt the manifestation of a prophecy (even doubting the "how" or the "when" is still doubt), and it is enough doubt to pull against your faith and keep it from manifesting. If the enemy can, he will work through the sins, unrighteousness or doubt of a Believer who is bringing you a Word, in order to infect your word with enough doubt to keep YOU from allowing it to manifest. That is why we must discern the spirit by the spirit and receive a prophet as a prophet - the mouth-piece (the Words) of God Himself.
Stay in that Word and remind God of His Word. Revisiting, remembering and retrieving the prophetic Words given to you, fuels your faith and your belief in them coming to pass. It strengthens your confidence in God and His love for you. But reminding God of His Word, strengthens your love for Him. Like a parent who overhears her child bragging to his friends that his mom is going to take him to Legoland or buy him a bike. It encourages the mother who has indeed made these promises because it shows that her child believes and trusts her. And it reminds her of her commitment to those promises - not because they were given without the intent to keep them, but because the reminder strengthens the bond of love between parent and child. It is the love the parent has for the child when making those promises and the love the child has for the parents when receiving the manifestation of those promises. How much greater are the promises of God and the very nature of God Himself? We must know that God IS, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him.

In All things seek God's Word!

Seek Jesus who is the Word abiding in you!
Seek the manifestation of the words of the new covenant written upon your heart!
Seek the written word of God through His scriptures!
Seek the Word of God through His gift of prophecy!
And seek the manifestation of the prophetic words spoken over you!

Seek and you shall find, Knock and the door shall be opened unto you!

Power, love and peace, ya'll!
~Min. Dez

Blessings & Curses

2011-09-22T11:03:00.000-07:00

Yes, God is not happy with the decisions of many Americans. But He loves ALL Americans.

Yes, God is not happy with the decisions of many, many people all over the world, and in every nation - including Israel and Palestine. But He loves them all.

God so loved the WORLD that He have His only begotten Son, so that whosoever should believe on Him would not perish, but have everlasting life.

God has already given His love, forgiveness and path for redemption to ALL mankind - not just to those who would believe, might believe or do believe - but to ALL, whether they will ever believe or not.

God is not "punishing" America - nor is He punishing any country, nation or race of people.

The "punishments", curses, trials, sufferings and deaths of any group of peoples; a country or a nation; a city, town, community or village are a direct result of our own sin, our own sins, our own decisions and the curses out of our own mouths.

The state of our world is, and always has been a direct result of mankind deciding every single day, over and over again, to eat of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil instead of eating from the Tree of Life - Jesus, the Lord and Christ.

I have heard "prophets" and "prophetic analysts" speaking on the alleged damage American political leaders, including President Barak Obama have and are making that they say will destroy America. I don't know what these "religious leaders" are trying to accomplish. It seems like they are fostering more fear mongering - fear mongering in the name of God - to counteract the fear mongering in the name of Allah. I don't know...

They provide no solutions, no options, no hope and no plan of action, accept to breed doubt and mis-trust in our leaders; fear of what will happen to our economy, safety and national freedoms; and a helplessness that says not only is God not doing anything, but He is bringing this judgement upon the whole country because of a few rebel, un-patriotic, non-Christian Americans who "may not actually be American" anyway.

BUT, here is the vision God just showed me: He wants to scoop America and even the world into His arms and cradle us like a precious baby who is still just learning to walk, stumbling and getting bumped and bruised, who then accidentally tumbles against the hot stove and gets burned, even though we were told not to touch it.

I still see the baptism of our President in the Spirit of God; the Holy Ghost. I still feel the love and compassion God has for America... and Israel and Palestine.... and all of the world.

The decisions of the political forces in this world are no surprise to God.

The political forces of this world - the powers that be - are all operating in a power that comes only from God.

And all things WILL work together for GOOD, for those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose.

If you love the Lord, have confessed Him as your Lord, and are called according to HIS purpose (and not your own), then you should know that the economy, health care, international, domestic and community terrorism, abortion, world-wide famine, cheating political leaders, and cross-gender homosexual dancers on TV are not all a part of God's unfavorable judgement on us, but are all a part of the same epidemic sickness that mankind has suffered from since the Garden of Eden: Sin - which is separation from God.

Revelation 22:1-3: And He showed me a pure river of water of life, clear as crystal, proceeding out of the throne of God and of the Lamb. In the midst of the street of it, and of either side of the river, was there the tree of life, which bare twelve manner of fruits, and yielded her fruit every month: and the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. And there shall be no more curse: but the throne of God and of the Lamb shall be in it; and His servants shall serve Him.

So... here's what I wish I could say to all those so-called "servants of God" who are "prophesying" and "interpreting prophetic instances" regarding America and the alleged judgement of God they say we are and will be suffering: if you are truly a servant of the Most High God - serve Him and serve the nations and their leaders by providing the Tree of Life to them, so that she can yield her fruit every month and so her leaves can be for healing.

Every month PRAY healing and life (remembering that Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life) to all nations and her leaders.

The fervent prayers of the righteous avail much. If you feel your prayers are ineffectual, the first problem could be that your prayers are weak and infrequent, or prayed without power instead of fervent. Or most likely it could be because you do not realize that YOU as a believer (any believer), ARE the righteousness of Christ - not by your own efforts, but by faith through Jesus Christ. You CAN and should be accomplishing much through your prayers.

Ephesians 3:20: Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above ALL that WE ask or think, according to the POWER that works in US. We have power in prayer, through faith and belief.

If you feel America is cursed, pray blessings upon her. If you feel your government and her political leaders are cursing you and all members of this nation, then pray blessings upon them. The Lord says in Luke 6:28 "Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you."

Since you as a believer are redeemed from the curse of the law, there is power in your blessings.

May God forever bless America, her leaders. And today I pray that God will bless President Barak and First Lady Michelle Obama with the pure salvation of the Lord and baptism in the Holy Ghost, in the name of Jesus, amen.

Power, love & peace ya'll -
(II Timothy 1:7)
~Min. Dez

The Split

2011-07-27T23:37:00.000-07:00

I see a change happening.

I see a splitting off in the spirit.

4 1/2 or 5 years ago, during President Obama's campaign I saw a splitting of the people - a choosing up of sides that had nothing to do with the political arena. It was a spiritual dividing line that used the campaign as a cover.

Dodge Ball got banned when I was in elementary school, but we used to play in secret - or so we thought. We would choose up sides, bust each other with the ball and hope we didn't get busted for playing. It was that clandestine choosing up of sides that I saw in the spirit realm. And the dividing line was not Christians on the Republican side and everybody else in every other political party. Each party got their "fair share" of Jews & Gentiles; Saved and Un-Saved.

Then a year or more ago I saw another splitting off - this too was political/spiritual in nature. I saw the peoples of America lined up behind 3 crowns: who would they serve? They were filing in by the masses in even lines, equally numbered and marching towards the crown of their choice and these crowns represented their master; their allegiance and their commitment. Only one crown was for our Lord Jesus Christ.

But today I see a split that is religious/spiritual in nature. And perhaps that is actually an accurate description of the split itself - between the "religious" and the "spiritual". The bible says true religion is helping the widows and orphans, but the word "religion" has become a by-word for the bureaucracy, regiment, doctrine, structure and "social climate" of the church today.

And let me tell you in case you didn't already know - the word has much negative connotation and it is mostly justifiable.

I wasn't "raised in the church". Church bureaucracy and mores bewilder me. Much of it just does not match up with the word of God written in my bible. It's a conglomeration of tradition, pomp & circumstance; show-boating and showmanship that is protected, defended and enforced through falsely applied scripture, obedience, guilt and even shame.

And what I see is that God is tired of it.

God is tired of preachers demanding that their congregation worship Him in Spirit and in Truth - and yet, no one does. In many churches "Praise and Worship" has become a title that designates a particular time in the service that has little to do with with opening communication with the Holy Ghost and an invoking of the power of God's Glory.

God is splitting off the old religious powers that formulated these structures and traditions with a remnant of Kingdom minded preachers that will let the Holy Ghost have His way as in the early days of the church.

God's people are desperately praying for His intervention; for answers; for miracles; for power and the manifestation of His promises. But God has been limited in His ability to answer these requests because of the structural limitations placed on His sources for expressing those answers! If you want God to work in your life, then give Him free reign to do so!

And another thing - how can church leaders say, "let all things be done decently and in order" then turn around and say that the Holy Spirit would not act in certain ways that they might deem as disruptive, radical or outrageous? Hello... 120 people all babbling, wobbling and praising at 9 am in the morning so that everyone who saw them supposed that they were drunk!? That doesn't sound like the church's definition of decently and in order!

Or what about the Glory of God filling the temple with such a cloud that the priests couldn't even stand or minister? That doesn't sound like today's definition of "decent and in order" either.

The Holy Ghost is craning His spiritual neck and chomping and His supernatural bit, just for churches and pastors to let go and let Him in and stop squelching Him just as soon as He shows up when they ask Him to. Right when the Spirit of God falls upon a congregation, that's when they stop service and tell you it's time to take offering or preach a message with no power from the Word. No, instead that should be the time to stand and bask in the Glory of God and let the Holy Ghost do the work the people were just praying, praising and worshipping Him for!

That's my soap box... it has been so spiritually frustrating for me.

But I see that the Spirit of God is frustrated too. The time has come when God will make a change in HIS church! True worship... a praise that He can inhabit... miracles, signs and wonders... and the days shall return when congregations will be in one place and in one accord and the Holy Ghost will descend upon ALL in the room like cloven tongues of fire. The days shall return when souls will be healed, restored and SAVED by the thousands at one time... The days are returning and even now have begun...

And the days of pastors who stick to their structure of praise and worship, announcements, offering, preach the word, give an altar call and the benediction are over for the Holy Ghost. This not the church that God has called out. He has called out a body of believers. The is "church as usual" - no matter how much a pastor may say it is not.

It is a new day. New preachers are being split off from the old. Old things are passed away, behold all is become new. There is a splitting off from "church as usual" to the church of the unusual and peculiar. Where healings are on the regular, demons are cast out daily, lepers are cleansed and the dead are raised - literally, not figuratively.

Isn't that what we, the church, have been called out to do?

Power, love & peace, ya'll -
~Min. Dez

New Word...

2011-06-02T22:03:00.000-07:00

Only a bit ago, the Lord instructed me that He wants me to begin telling of my thoughts for the Nations and His people. And specifically, to be confident that my "thoughts" are prophetic and not simply my own.

A new season is here - and many have felt it. We've felt the shift; we've felt the change... and even if we didn't know what the change was specifically, I know many of us have anticipated it for years now.

This season... while truthfully is indeed a season unto itself, it is actually a season of preparation. It is preparation for a greater, more spectacular season to come.

And in the spirit of "preparation" there is most obviously much training and pruning taking place. But there is also elevation and placement. There is also protection and favor. And, oddly enough, there is also restoration, opportunity and wealth transfer. Finally, there is growth, revelation and transition into the Supernatural.

These aspects of what I see as "steps of preparation" may seem disjointed in my limited explanation, but I see a picture more clearly now - a picture that once began with the simple word: "infiltration."

So, in the first, I will describe the season to come - the season of which we are being prepared for, and then perhaps the details of our preparation will seem clearer as well.

The Lord our God is truly beginning to pour out His Spirit upon His sons and daughters in a much greater degree than ever before. Periodic and previous revelations of the church will be revitalized and revisited and there will be so much more. We are being prepared for a spiritual battle. We are being prepared for the beginning of the end.

These are the last days of the last of the Last Days. This is the beginning of the End of Days - the beginning of the latter days. We are the generations before the last generations that will see the coming of the Christ.

I believe that if my son, who is 6 as of the date of this writing, were to be blessed to see the fullness of all his days, plus - he will see the coming of the Lord before all 120 years. I believe these babies are the last of the babies to be born on this earth... but how many babies constitute the last? Perhaps my son will be the oldest of this generation - this last generation. This I cannot say for sure, but I say it as an illustration of how close I believe the end of times acturally are.

And satan knows this better than I.

Do not be misled - these earthquakes in diverse places are THE "earthquakes in divers places." These wars and rumors of wars are THE "wars and rumors of wars."

We have been in the last days - the 7th day - since the disciples first said so. But sunset is coming soon. I see the color of the sky changing... and even darkening.

In fact, the powers of darkness are pitching their last ditch efforts as if they do not know the outcome.

And God is preparing us like never before. We are the generation to train those who are to come and who are to remain when Christ comes again. The Lord has called us a generation of "Josephs and Esthers" who are currently in training so that we can train up the "Benjamin Generation" that is here and is to come. They will truly be a generation that will know the battle is not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities. The Benjamin Generation will be true Spiritual Warriors greater in battle very nearly than even the angels.

And we, leaders of today who hear with a rhema ear and live in the revelatory word of God, we are their teachers. And we are being prepared.

Now more than any church movement in history - including the dawn of the early church after Pentecost - now is the time when we will learn to manifest the fullness of God's word in ways we cannot yet fully comprehend. We will begin to walk in ALL the power, authority, dominion and Spirit of God that the Word seems to only hint about.

But the manifestation of ALL will come with the outpouring of God's Spirit.

ALL will be healed who have a need of healing.
Multitudes will be saved and delivered like never before
Devils will be exposed and cast out
Creative, extraordinary miracles will be performed
Waters will be walked upon
The dead will be resurrected - before the coming of Christ.
People will be translated from place to place supernaturally
Believers will become supernaturally wealthy
Believers will have resources that the world cannot get anywhere else
Believers will hold positions of power, leadership and authority in diverse places
Soccer Moms will heal broken bones on the field
Whole communities and towns will come to salvation
"Commoners" will hold positions of respect and reverence amongst great men and women of the world.
Regular people will begin to do these and even the "greater than these" things Jesus talked about, and they will teach others how to do them as well.

And because of all of this, Believers will be greatly, greatly persecuted. Not to worry though... God will still favor us to be the heads and not the tails, the lenders and not the borrowers. It will infuriate the powers of darkness that rule the world. But we will maintain, exercise and teach the power we have over the powers of the enemy.

And so we are being prepared in this season. Our faith is being prepared - the kind of faith that when spoken, manifests that word into the instant and physical representation of that word - just like the God whose image we are created in.

Our belief is being prepared. A belief that says yes, I can be translated instantly from California to the slave-trade streets in Thailand to save a soul; or to a hospital room across town to heal a child. It is a belief that knows Christ's death on the cross was also for our prosperity so that the wealth of the world's Billionaires can be supernaturally transferred to us to feed hungry souls that cannot afford it when bread costs a day's wage.

Do you have an ear to hear?

If what I've written seems like utter nonsense and the ramblings of a spiritually delusional and theologically uneducated woman, then you will not be a leader in this generation of preparation.

But if you've felt a pull of understanding and a tug of connection... welcome to the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness. His Kingdom has come. His will shall be done. On Earth as it is in Heaven. And the blood of the lamb and the words of our testimony will overcome the world.

In the name of Jesus, Amen.

~Min. Dez

Change to Original

2011-02-21T10:21:00.000-08:00

Until now, this blog has lived FOR obscurity and IN obscurity. My posts have been cloaked in the safety of the unseen. Concerned enough to say, "What if..." Cautiously written "just in case..." But this is the season for change. Not ordinary change, but for changing back to original intentions.

This blog: Destination Reflection; today is changing back to its original intention.

This life: Deidre Kay Campbell-Jones, today, is changing back to her original intention.

We as a people, are changing back to God's original intention.

And from now on, this blog will reflect those changes - whether anyone reads them or not.

Original Blog Intent: To share the deepest of my thoughts, un-inhibited in spirit, and in truth. To chronicle the progress of my my life and God's purpose for it. To share with others in written form that which I have no other opportunity or platform to share through any other medium.

Original Life Intent: To walk in the fullness of God's power. To teach, example, preach, write and lead others into the fullness of God's Glory, Power and Grace. To live and to show others how to live in the manifested realm of God's Word. To walk in God's promises and to show others how to do the same. To have a true, manifested, tangible, full and moment-by-moment relationship with God Almighty, through His Son, Jesus and the Holy Ghost.

Which brings me to God's original intent for us as a people: All of the above. As well as:

Restoration
Reconciliation
Redemption

These are now words of "Christianise" that have grown to be meaningless. It must be the work of the devil because these 3 words are truly the most powerful words regarding our standing in life as Believers who have confessed with our mouths that Jesus, the Anointed One is God in the flesh, born of a virgin, died on the cross and resurrected on the third day.

What are we restored back to?
What are we reconciled back to?
What are we redeemed back to?

We are restored back to original dominion... for God.
We are reconciled back to original relationship... with God.
We are redeemed back to original power... in God.

Adam and Eve were created in the image of God and that image was not revoked. Adam and Eve were given dominion and that dominion was not revoked. Adam and Eve were given power and that power was not revoked.

Our original image was distorted (not revoked) by the lies of satan.
Our original dominion was given (not revoked) to satan by our own disobedience.
Our original power was diminished (not revoked) by our own lack of knowledge and understanding.

Our created image in God still IS. We can take back our dominion and we can walk in the fullness of our true power once again. By God, because of Jesus, through the Holy Ghost.

God, came to Earth, clothed in flesh as Jesus. Fully God. Fully Human.

How? Because Mary's DNA and God's DNA formed one Man - free from the seed of sin passed through the seed of the male; pure from sin by the seed of the Holy Ghost.

Why? Because God said, "the life is in the Blood." And only a blood capable of Eternal Life could be the antidote to the sickness of eternal death. Only God's blood could save us from man's death. But God is a Spirit. And so He relinquished the Glory of His Spirit and clothed Himself in the glory of man, so that He would have the only blood pure enough to redeem us back to life.

What!? Because everything Jesus did on Earth He did as MAN, not as GOD. If He had done it as God he would have called down leagues of 10,000 angels to wipe out the devil himself. But He didn't in order to show us the power WE have over the devil. He healed all who had need to show us the power WE have over sickness. He raised people from the dead to show us the power WE have over death. He was brought low and made poor to show us the power, dominion and riches WE have as men and women of God. Jesus walked on water, calmed the storms, fed thousands and turned water to wine so that WE would see what WE are capable of - not so we would know what God was capable of.

God showed what He was capable of to the Israelites and they didn't listen.

God is showing us what WE are capable of through Jesus Christ. ARE YOU LISTENING?

~Power, Love & Peace, ya'll -
Min. D
Delaileona

PROPHECY FOR AMERICA #2 - 7/16/2010

2010-07-16T11:57:00.000-07:00

Part 2 of this prophetic word to the Nation:

This morning as my alarm went off, I hit the button and went back to sleep. And I saw our President, President Obama sitting at his desk - papers, Bills and pressing concerns lay scattered all across the top. As he looked at them, hands placed on top of them, a flood; a deluge of the Holy Spirit fell from the ceiling upon him, drenching him in the Spirit of God. Then the tide flowed from him and out from him as a wave of water rushing over his desk and washing away all that was there.

Some of the items on his desk were drowned and washed away. Others were cleansed and purified.

Then said the voice of God to me, "America is not forsaken. Just as the Nation of Israel will always represent my beloved Israelites no matter where they reside, America will always represent my beloved Gentiles, those who are adopted by faith into the family of God; the wild olive branch grafted into the tree.

America is not forsaken. She is pruned like a tree and plucked like the eagle's wings. I, the Lord your God am tired of my leaders - the ones whom I have anointed and lifted up - using my Name to propagate their own political agendas and views.

They misuse my Word to confirm and justify their lies and they believe they are justified because of their justification in Christ - because of my anointing. But the Spirit is not in those words and they will be separated from their views. As big churches and big leaders fall for their immorality and unrighteousness; for their dogma and 'religiosity', so too will mine anointed be plucked for their political deceit - deceiving my Believers and prophesying falsely by calling it 'teaching' and 'understanding.'

Even mine beloved John Hagee who loves my people of Israel will see his plucking come and he, like others with him - James Robinson, Perry Stone and others(*) will be separated from their words of lies. Even as America and her system of lies must needs be plucked - gay marriage; housing; banking; foreign policy; peace in the East - even as these issues are plucked and exposed, so too are my people, my beloved Gentiles. So that only those who worship in Spirit and in Truth will have the strength to stand and rebuild."

These are the Word of the Lord, as noted by His humble servant on this day,
~Min. Dez

(*) I see the face of another individual whose name I cannot or do not know at this time.

PROPHECY FOR AMERICA #1 - 7/15/2010

2010-07-15T09:15:00.000-07:00

After prayer and fasting for three days, I went to sleep on the evening of the 3rd day and I saw in my mind's eye 3 black triangles each triangle in the shape of a crown and I heard the voice of the Lord saying: "3 kings; 3 kings."

Then I saw a line of people marching towards the 3 kings. And a swoosh like a wave came over the people and I heard the rushing of water - a splashing; a deluge of water like a wave over the people.

And the revelation of God came to me saying, "there are 3 kings of this world - the king of death; the king of destruction and the One True King of Life." And the kings looked like 3 points of a crown. And the people were marching towards the king of their choice and they split - some to the left: the king of death. And some to the right: the king of destruction and others marched towards the King of Life in the middle.

And when the wave of water flushed over the people as they marched, God said, "I am pouring out my Spirit upon them all, but only those walking towards life will receive that anointing."

Then God showed me in the vision of my imagination an eagle in its hideaway nest. God reminded me that the national symbol of America is the eagle. And He told me America IS that Eagle. She is not forgotten, forsaken or punished like the Israelites who chose for themselves kings of persecution. No instead, America is like the Eagle who has retreated and is secluded for a time to pluck its wings, sharpen its beak and claws, and renew its strength.

God showed me in great and vivid detail the Eagle painstakingly plucking out its own feathers revealing the pink, scrawny flesh beneath with tiny, frayed, scattered and ragged feathers exposed. And He, God Almighty, spoke to me as the Eagle plucked saying, "Thus sayeth the Lord your God - America is plucking its feathers. This time of great and devastating trial for individuals is a part of that plucking - businesses; the economy; housing; wall street and banking - systems and individuals alike - even Christians in the churches especially are being plucked.

And like the Eagle whose worst is exposed, its jagged ugliness revealed - so is America revealing its ugliness - seeming even to prefer it and glorify its worst by exposing the worst, wearing it on the surface of life and pulling out; pulling down that which ordinarily seems good. The worst is coming to people's lives and their good things; their comfort, security and best is being plucked from them.

And like the Eagle when his feathers are gone - even though he's plucked all the good feathers on purpose, the Eagle is not at its best. The Eagle cannot fly and cannot soar. The Eagle is grounded and weakened. The Eagle is exposed and in danger - vulnerable. And it must retreat to protect itself during this time of plucking and of great vulnerability.

So too will America be. So too will the individual be - exposing their worst as if it is preferred; exposed in their worst as if it is common. And the eagle, like America plucks its own feathers. The eagle, like America and like the individual do this to themselves. There is no one else to blame.

We do this to ourselves through the choices we make and the decisions we make. America and its leaders will begin to make more and more decisions we do not understand. More systems will fall. Churches will fall. Leaders will fall. Individuals - Christians and non-Christians alike will fall - for the wheat and the tares grow up together and God sends rain upon them all."

But God said to me that as the feathers begin to grow, the Eagle may still pluck them out. It is necessary for balance and optimum performance of the new feathers until finally, ultimately the Eagle will allow the feathers to grow. And like America it will grow strong and full of glory. And eventually the beak and claws will be sharp again. And like America we will be sharp and on top again. It is a pruning that is necessary.

And of the leaders, there will be a few which will be allowed to grow first. And of the churches there will be a few which will be allowed to grow first. Even the people represent feathers. And how we will grow back will be through those of us in the church - the Believers that remain faithful, praiseful and true in Christ Jesus. We who withstand these trials and go through them believing in Jesus, never wavering and never falling to sin - we will rebuild. We rebuild ourselves, we rebuild the churches, we rebuild America, we rebuild.

And like the Eagle's feathers there will be a few individuals who will be allowed to grow first. No Eagle's feathers grow all at once and immediately. Invariably there are always a few that emerge first and will be allowed to grow. Watch for the "firsts" in leadership, in the churches and in the people and then will all the systems, the churches, the people and America itself rebuild and be strong - strong enough to soar once again.

The word of prophecy from His humble servant on this day,
~Min. Dez

CALL & RESPONSE...

2009-08-04T07:08:00.000-07:00

Acts 26:16: But rise, and stand upon thy feet: for I have appeared unto thee for this purpose, to make thee a minister and a witness both of these things which thou hast seen, and of those things in the which I will appear unto thee;

I was incomplete. I had no purpose, no new plan and at 42 years old I still was searching for what I wanted to be now that I was "grown up." I decided once and for all that I would choose my absolute dream career, decide what I would need to change about my life to accomplish it and do so with professional, determined fervor and wisdom. I looked to the core of my being - what I loved, what I was especially good at and what I would be proud to say was my career until the end of my days.

The answer: writer and speaker.

I searched the internet, read books and joined social network groups looking for people doing the same thing. I asked questions, joined online discussions and attended seminars and webinars. Those gave me a step-by-step plan for changing a career and two of the most important suggestions everyone and every book made consistently was to make a plan and find a mentor.

I made a month-by-month outline for writing and publishing specific works and I set out to find a mentor. I joined the Sylmar Chamber of Commerce which ultimately led me to a man, a pastor and a Bishop who looked me in my eyes upon first meeting and asked me what he could do for me. Jokingly I got bold and told him he could be my mentor. Immediately he agreed and immediately he followed through.

Months later in July 2008, his wife invited me to speak at her women's fellowship. I had just completed and published the first booklet on my list. I was right on track to publish one a month. Now I was officially a speaker, author and a publisher - and all to the Glory of God! I knew I was well on my way towards finally finding myself.

Afterward, the Bishop made a video of the engagement and posted my name as Min. Deidre Campbell-Jones. It looked good. But I admitted I was not a minister when he'd asked and he told me I would need to be if I wanted to get paid by churches for my speaking engagements. They asked me to begin teaching at the Bible College that September and I considered joining the ministry school, but chose a free online course instead.

For weeks prior, maybe even months - I had been suffering a terrible itch in my feet. The burning was consuming and unpredictable. I hadn't used a new soap, nor had I recently used any new lotions, no new shoes or socks - just the same 42 year old feet!

But I changed lotions, used oils, slept in medicated lotion and pedicure socks, soaked in medicated foot baths, exfoliated with foot scrubs, increased my pedicures - I tried nearly everything but the itch would not stop. Oh, yeah - I scratched, and scratched and scratched.

Nothing helped.

It began to be a distraction. Shoes would get kicked off at the most inappropriate times - to scratch. Flip-flops were worn in inappropriate circumstances - to scratch, and my walk changed, my talk changed and even my focus changed all because of the itching, burning and scratching.

Everything I tried made the itching increase - although my feet were supple, smooth and soft!

Finally, in a frantic, burning panic I went to the church on a Wednesday afternoon. I didn't know what to expect, didn't know what to ask. I knew one of the church leaders was said to have the gift of healing, but I'd never seen it for myself, never experienced it and wasn't even sure I believed in it. I also wasn't even sure if she was even going to be at the church, but I went anyway - if nothing else but to cry out to the Lord in prayer for relief.

She was there and as soon as she hugged me she said - "Oh, come on, let's pray." She took me into the sanctuary and she kicked off her sandals. I took off my flip-flops. She anointed my head with oil and began to pray. I cannot remember one word of what she said accept at one point she said, "Yes, there it is."

I could barely pray with her. I was distracted. I don't know if I was waiting for the itching to stop or for white lights to descend from heaven or an angel of the Lord to walk through the door and announce I was healed. But at the end of her prayer, none of that had happened and the burning had not been abated. She told me the "Lord would minister to me for three days." I didn't know what that meant and I went home bleary-eyed.

For three days the burning and itching did not stop. Finally, I was driven to the word of God in sheer desperation and craze. I went to my online bible concordance and typed in "feet". I had no idea what I was looking for or what I might find, but I found what God wanted me to see.

Acts 26:16: But rise, and stand upon thy feet: for I have appeared unto thee for this purpose, to make thee a minister and a witness both of these things which thou hast seen, and of those things in the which I will appear unto thee;

And visible right under that scripture was this:
Rom:10:15: And how shall they preach, except they be sent? as it is written, How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things!

I was sent to my knees with tears of stunning revelation! Could it be true? Without a doubt it was true. Like a zombie I walked upstairs, crying, dazed and bewildered. It was time to get dressed for the day. I showered and in that shower I realized my feet did not itch or burn!

"Yes! Yes, Lord - I understand and I accept!" And it was then that I was anointed and baptized with the Holy Ghost.

I went back to the scriptures to see what had happened to me - what did I just do? What did I just accept? Acts 26:16 continues with this: 17: Delivering thee from the people, and from the Gentiles, unto whom now I send thee, 18: To open their eyes, and to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan unto God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins, and inheritance among them which are sanctified by faith that is in me.

Am I really to be sent? Can I really do all this? Not alone - not on my own; only with and through the power of the Holy Ghost.

I remained drunk and bewildered, distracted by the Spirit of God upon me for the rest of the day and Saturday too. On Sunday my Bishop was teaching and his sermon led us to the book of Luke and my eyes wandered away from the text and found Luke 4:18-19 "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, To preach the acceptable year of the Lord."

There. I was reconciled. I went to the altar - with no more tears - but peace, indescribable peace. Oh, yeah and soft, supple, itch-free, BEAUTIFUL feet!

That Tuesday, after Bible Study an older, newly licensed pastor was saying goodbye to me, walked away and came back. "The Lord just told me to give you this bible." It was a paperback ESV version. "Ok, thank you." I said, wondering what God was up to now.

That same day as I was rereading the scriptures God had given me regarding my calling, I noticed that Romans 10:15 was in all-caps. In my study bible that means those words are a direct quote from the Old Testament. I decided to search for the original text - it proved to be a little bit of a challenge. I found it - Isaiah 52:7 (all my favorite numbers). I was looking for my large study bible to look it up and passed by the ESV I'd just been given and decided to find it there: "How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth!"

There. I was complete. I have finally found myself. Oh, the journey is just beginning, the trials will be harder, newer and more challenging. And walking by faith may lead me down a long and grueling road. But my feet... will be beautiful, no matter what!

One year later, and badly in need of a pedicure I will receive my license into the service of the Kingdom of God as a Minister of the Gospel.

Finally I am what I never knew I always wanted to be when I grew up. Now maybe it's time to grow up. Nah... I think I'll schedule a pedicure instead! :D

Power, love & peace ya'll! (2 Timothy 1:7)
"~Min. Dez"

Angel of Faith

2009-05-21T18:48:00.000-07:00

I saw my faith today. And I didn’t help him; didn’t ask what he needed – I just shooed him away.

I saw my faith today and I dreamt about him last night. In my vision he was strong and confident, handsome and smiling at me. He was sitting on a bench as if waiting for the bus. I smiled and said hello. And when I turned again to point him out he had gone away.

I saw my faith today and I know it was him. In my lament the day before I had asked to see my faith just as Jesus had seen from those he’d healed. It was not ironic that he should appear today when I’d only just asked of him yesterday.

I saw my faith today and I didn’t even recognize him until it was too late.

He laid on my lawn, face to the fence, disheveled and a bit mismatched. Glasses covered his eyes from the light but not any light that shined from me. I told him my lawn was not the place to be. “Ok,” he said. “Ok?” I asked. “Yes, I’m Ok,” he replied and still I let my light hide.

I saw my faith today and regretted I’d left him once I got about a block away. I turned to return and ask how I could help or ask of his need. But when I was back my faith was nowhere to be seen.

I saw my faith today and I know it was him. I had asked to see where my faith lacked, and when I had the chance I forgot to ask and it was too late by the time I came back.

I saw my faith today and if he was just a bum, I met him not with love but instead with fear. I didn’t even ask of God to listen to what He would have me hear.

I saw my faith today and treated him with disgrace. If compassion had prevailed I would have treated him with God's sufficient grace.

I saw my faith today and gave him no compassion for his strength. My faith is weak and wanting and my fear keeps him from growing and showing what he’s capable of. I canceled his chance to do what he could, if I would have just show a little bit of love.

I saw my faith today and in my fear, I didn’t listen and couldn’t hear. And when I could have helped; could have given him increase, instead I sent him away.

Dear Faith, come back and if you will, with compassion I will generously add to your lack. And if I see my faith again someday – oh, Faith – Dear Faith, I pray; next time I’ll not send you away.

CONDEMNATION

2009-05-07T19:15:00.000-07:00

Romans 8:1: "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit."

Really? Well, there shouldn't be. At least not amongst ourselves. If there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, why then do so many believers suffer such condemnation - especialy and mostly from other believers?

It's like when my mom would tell me to let my son do something I had already told him he couldn't. When I complained to her that she'd never had let me when I was his age and how could she go against my word - she told me that her father had done it to her and she didn't like it either.

As for the church, this situation is definitely not at all like dealing with a 4 year old and a grandmother handing out candy. No, in the church we're talking about what seems to be a public flogging - not for sin, but perhaps for disobedience or a misunderstanding, rumors, cliques or a bad message from a new minister. And in this public execution the convicted is given no trial, no defence and no opportunity for explanation. And not only that, the accused must take it without flinching, expression or complaint, I might add!

It's as if our church leaders and elders have suffered such condemnation themselves that they feel it is their duty and obligation to pass the buck.

Well, the buck stops here!

As a manager at AT&T (and a good one, I might add), I didn't much care for the trickle down theory. So long as my team was doing their job (and doing it it well, I might add), then whatever mess upper-management wanted me to harrass my team with, stayed right with me and they never heard it. Some management techniques are just unnessary in order to get the best out of your team.

Wouldn't it be nice if it were mandatory for Pastors and church leaders to attend the same management courses I did?

I think perhaps they hold on to Titus 1:13: "This witness is true. Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith;" as a justification for being harsh. But this scripture in Titus, let's not forget, is talking about the "many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake."

And so, if you go this route, be sure of it's usage, I might add - because, what goes around comes around... or in more biblical terms, you reap what you sow.

Or maybe the leaders are kind-of partial to a scripture in 1 Timothy chapter 5 as their justification. Verse 20 says: "Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear." I get the rebuke before all part - but still, this scripture is talking about sin, people! And the bible is clear about what sin is. And, last I checked not being decent and in order is not listed as a sin.

Now, don't get me wrong I am not in anyway advocating disobedience amongst the church leadership. The bible does say to do things decently and in order and so that is what we must do. And there are requirements of leadership that are expressed in God's word that must be adhered to. Leadership must provide a specific example and must be accurate in their teachings and most not fall prey to spirits of gossip, lying or deception. Duh, sounds obvious to me.

But what seems not to be so obvious within the church, is how best to deal with such common needs of correction (that exist within and outside of the church, I might add).

But gee, I seem to remember a scripture about going to an individual first and if they don't listen and repent, then go before the church, then take it to the leaders. Hhmm...

Listen, all lessons are for the greater good - without a doubt. But some lessons are to learn what to do and others are to learn what NOT to do. All I can say is I know what I will NEVER do.

Never have, never will. The buck stops here - for me, there is and will not be any condemnation (at least not publicly) for them that are in Christ Jesus - and under my leadership, I might add.

Power, love & peace, People!
~Min. Dez

CONFESSIONS OF A CONFIDENT COLOR

2009-02-01T21:02:00.000-08:00

Once I was blue like the color of covered up confidence or lack thereof, dreaming of love with a song and a sigh – not when doves, but when young girls cry. I didn’t know why I was longing and aching, making up dreams and faking life at the seams; a facade of me and pretend identity, confidence un-true, like that deep indigo blue is just a weak purple wannabe. I was striving to be like a royal purple princess – you know the rest, trying to be different like everyone else. Instead plain and simple, I was just regular blue, sad and true.

Confessions of change… Color Change… the range of me.
Forget faking the funk that junk was getting old. And so I replaced -confidence not drawn but traced, with red like the color bold. Oh, my red was like a deep “come hither”, strong enough to make any man wither. My red was sassy or so I was told and to me that was confidence as good as gold. This was the life, I figured I had it made, I was in charge – everyone else had to meet my grade. Sharp and quick and a cutting wit, I was the snake - don’t get bit. Drip. When suddenly I quit. Dripped red like blood, straight from the cross - this life of bold, now old, no loss.

Confessions of change… Color change… the range of me.
Black: thick, not empty but full of lack – confidence and esteem, joy and the ability to dream. Like a ship with no one at its helm I was tossed by the storm and overwhelmed. Little and belittled, abused, not amused, mistreated and misused - never could I admit, with a ring and “I do” that that this was the black that I did choose. I found deaths’ sting within that ring, so I escaped the black and never looked back. I made easier living by forgiving the “x”, but shame changed to blame that I gave to God. There ain’t nothing blacker than that, right? Go ahead you all can nod.

Confessions of change… color change the range of me…
My color is new again after that long black night – now it is purple, bet you though it was white. No – that was after black days turned to grays like the haze of imperfection and an empty gaze. Not even new rays of the only begotten one could warm my heart once the gray had begun – blanching, and bleaching and blank like white - loving myself was too much like right. Self-forgiveness so hesitant and what tried to be confident, now like white, the color non-existent.

Confessions of change… color change the range of me…
Now here’s a little mix you may not know – excuse me for a moment if it messes my flow. But blue (like confidence un-true) added to red (the bold replacing confidence instead) makes purple you see, the purple that now is me. Add black (just a little is all you get) and if it doesn’t overwhelm you’ll get violet. Now add a touch of white and comes back the color purple, just like my life confidence has come full circle. Each color alone I might like to forget, but to do so would mean I would only reject – the portrait so skillfully painted and meant - to be. God had to mix all the colors you see to make this glory, royal beauty, God’s truly confident me.

I am a child of God – my father has given me a coat of many colors – the colors of confidence and love without hindrance. I am a child of God!

© 2008 Deidre Campbell-Jones

Living Visions

2009-01-23T23:01:00.001-08:00

If you were to peruse the many lengthy posts, past the even lengthier permanent post and were able to some how piece together a chronology of truth, you might begin in April of 2008.

For two days I attended a Loral Langemeier business conference in Dallas, TX. NO ONE wanted to hear about my business choices: neither the business directory nor the "public speaking". They were steering me towards Graphic Design or some such thing.

Then upon meeting Loral I blurted out that I was going to be the Loral Langemeier of Christian Education. Good Lord! And my angst was more over saying such a dumb thing to Ms. Langemeier rather than where the heck did that come from?

But on the plane ride home I had my first ever vision and indeed did see myself speaking to masses of women. Women? Check out my non-profit and you'll see I've been primarily focused on teens! Where the heck did that come from?

So yes, I started that directory anyway and began researching the "public speaking" because I was going to do both, daggone it! And the directory led me to the Bishop who agreed immediately to be my mentor in "public speaking".

But still the vision persisted - and it grew! The details became clearer and crazier in my mind - but certainly clearer. And I kept them under wraps convinced I was nuts.

Then a prophet read my nutty thoughts and told them all back to me. Then the Bishop confirmed all those nutty thoughts and told them all back to me. Where the heck did all of that come from?

And so yes, I did my first speaking engagement at the Bishop's church - what a rush! I knew the Spirit of God had anointed me that night but still it was as if I was still saying, where the heck did that come from?

And I spoke again, and did a little something else, and I began teaching at the Bible College and I began pursuing a licence in ministry... hold up... yes, I did say minister's license. Now where the heck did THAT come from?

Somewhere along the way I had to admit that this was not just a career path and a really cool job - finally. Somewhere along the line I had answered and acknowledge just exactly where this was all coming from: God Himself.

I had been called. I had finally recognized the sound I had heard for so many, many years. Finally, every experience, every pain, every joy and every heart ache made sense - this was why: so that that I may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith I have been comforted of God. (2 Cor 1:4)

And I have had to transform myself through the renewing of my thoughts: I would like to be a minister; I am called to be a minister; I am working on becoming a minister; I am a minister elect; I AM A MINISTER of the Gospel of Jesus Christ!

And now I must admit I am still being transformed by the renewing of my thinking: The Vision.
Yeah, that one - way back in April.

It's time ya'll... it's 'bout time to begin. It's time to be about my Father's business. Just as prophecies are meant to be told, visions are meant to be lived...

SIGNIFICANT SIGNIFICANCE

2009-01-21T04:32:00.000-08:00

Here are my hopes for my family, my friends and indeed all of mankind in the midst of today’s significance:

Whether you voted for “the guy” or not… No matter what your political party… No matter what your ethnicity or economic status or religious beliefs are… There is a particular and extremely significant significance to the events of today: The inauguration of our 44th President, Barack Obama.

And yes, part of it has to do with ethnicity – but only a part. And part of it has to do with economic status – but only a part. And again, some of it does have to do with religious belief – but only a part, and only perhaps for those who believe in God and in His Holy Word. And finally another small part does indeed have to do with our political parties.

I will start at the latter. You see, no matter whether you consider yourself Republican or Democrat, conservative or liberal, Independent, Moderate or other – there is no way Barack Obama could have been voted into office by just the Democrats alone. And with an 80+% approval rating – or some such thing – there is no way he could reach a number like that through just the Democrats alone. And so it seems his message of unifying the parties has already begun to come to fruition – and that is a fact that is significant. My hope is that it continues.

And you see, no matter what your ethnicity, race or nationality – there is no way Barack Obama could have been voted into office by just the African Americans, Hawaiians and citizens of Illinois all by themselves. And with that 80+% approval rating – or whatever it is – there is now way he could have reached those kinds of numbers with just the African Americans, Hawaiians and Illinois residents. And so it seems as if his message of unifying the American people regardless of ethnicity, race or nationality has already begun to come to fruition – and that is a fact that is extremely significant. My hope is that it continues.

And so, you see, no matter how much money you do or do not make, no matter how affected you are or are not by the current economic crisis, and no matter whether you might or might not be affected by any taxation changes Barack Obama may or may not make, approximately 80+% of Americans (no matter what their economic status is) have a hope that he will make significant changes to the current economy. And there is no way that number of 80+% - or something like that – could have been reached by just poor people with hope, unemployed people with hope or people who hope they won’t lose their houses. And since it seems that hope is very good for the economy – for example; hope can make the stock market soar and fear can make the stock market plummet – it seems as if his message of economic hope has already begun to come to fruition (at least if only in the hearts of the American people) – and that is very significant indeed. My hope is that his actions in office match the hope in many of our hearts.

And finally, you see, (for those of us who believe) that God does indeed ordain and/or choose the worlds leaders, that would have to include the “good” ones and the “bad” ones. The “bad” ones pave the way for the “good” ones and the “good” ones provide a foundation for the “bad” ones. One cannot be without the other preceding or following. And so whether you think the former administration was good or bad, and whether you think the new and current administration will be good or bad – the truth of the matter (to those of us who chose to believe) is that “ALL things work to the greater good of they that love the Lord.” And that is significantly significant indeed. My hope is that in all things – or at least 80+% (or somewhere around there) – Barack Obama (through the will of God) will succeed in all he hopes to do.

So whether he does or not, the significant significance of today is that I am included in about 80+% of the American people whose hope extends towards all mankind – whether you voted for the guy or not; no matter what your political party; no matter what your economic status; no matter what your ethnicity and no matter what your religious beliefs are or are not.

I wish you all happiness and hope and better days ahead for us all.

God bless you and may God continue to richly bless America.

© 2008 Deidre Campbell-Jones (aka – “Min. Dez”)

New Year Update

2009-01-04T23:31:00.000-08:00

So since my last post, announcing that I have accepted the call to preach, and teach and make disciples, the Lord has kept on calling...

- As of September 16 I began teaching at Union University Bible College each Tuesday evening.

- I will be in charge of the newsletter at the Family Church International, Pasadena CA - I will work on them naming and Editorial Department and me as director. :D

- I am also attending classes at the Bible College and, each class I teach; each message I give and all of my past ministry experience works towards the expediting of my ministers license to be administered this year.

- I have officially published my first booklet entitled "The Limitless Power of Faith" and expect to complete others soon. And the second (and far more beautiful) 2009 Destination "Limitless Faith" Calendar is now available!

My new Bishop and mentor has given me the "green light" to pursue speaking engagements outside of the church and I am diligently and passionately pursuing any and all ventures.

This endeavor works toward the goal and vision of my larger speaking engagement and book tour. So yes, it's time to get started on that first full book and get it published!

And, most importantly - the Lord has blessed me with spiritual gifts I did not expect and am so thrilled and overwhelmed by. Any day the Lord speaks is a very good day indeed!

With all that being said, I have also had the visions that I will pastor a church and that the ongoing and ultimate goals of my current ministry (destinationchristianservices.net) will also come to fruition.

As a minister on the roster at the Family Church International, Bishop Donnie Williams has given all of us the assignment to begin a home bible study. I, of course (and for now), have started a "To Your Home" Email Bible Study and will post the messages on a new blog entitled: getliferightnow.blogspot.com. To receive those bible studies and to become a part of the fellowshipping community of GetLifeRightNow, join our online congregation at: getliferightnow.ning.com. My hope and prayer is that these sites will be the forerunner for a future church as per my vision and a prophet's word from the Lord for my life.

Speaking schedules, events and to book an engagement will be found at: GetLifeRightNow.com

Until then, His Love & Your Blessings,
~ Minister Dez

Birth Announcement

2008-11-22T13:31:00.000-08:00

Well - the post below entitled "Gestation" states I would be giving birth soon - and indeed, I did.

I personally have never actually been pregnant, although I do have a young son that came to us when he was just a few weeks old, so I cannot say how accurate this analogy is...

However, since the birth of my new "baby" it has been as if I'd forgotten I was pregnant and forgotten the labor as I struggle to get a acquainted with this new "infant" and the joys and process of nurturing this new addition to my life. And, I'd forgotten I'd written "Gestation".

Well - the post below says I'd scheduled a cesarean section which implies a fairly immediate birth and scheduled arrival. So, if I'm keeping with the analogy, I would say perhaps labor started on the day I was to have surgery and instead of going ahead with the cesarean, the doctor in charge (God Himself) said, "No surgery, you will go through labor no matter how long it takes."

I think I had a false labor in June - the date of my scheduled cesarean. And I had another false labor in August - but the birth of my baby actually was September 12, 2008!

And - the post below says I would upload not only the birth announcement, but pictures also. Ha! Pictures have been taken, but I don't have them so instead I will give you the standard statistical information required for each true birth announcement.

Name of Baby: My call from the Lord to teach, preach and make disciples "for the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ." Ephesians 4:12

Birthdate: September 12, 2008

Weight: Matthew 11:28: "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Because I am "like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth fruit in due season; my leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever I do shall prosper."

Length: Matthew 28:20: "Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen."

Gestation...

2008-05-28T19:16:00.000-07:00

Here is a snippet of truth...

Our God given purpose is like an egg cell in the ovary of a woman. When a female is born it is said that we already have all the eggs we'll ever have. Some will ripen to ovulation, most will not.

And just like that egg cell, I believe we are born with the seed of God's given purpose for our lives - lying dormant until ripened into fruition. Sometimes it does... most times it does not.

And like a little girl who dreams of getting married and having babies, we often dream of growing up and fulfilling some grand purpose for our lives. And even though girls dream of a life with children - they almost never dream of pregnancy, morning sickness, labor pains and cesareans. And they absolutely cannot envision exactly what day those children will be born, what they will look like, how they will act or what grades they'll get in school.

And so we grow dreaming of a purpose but cannot actually, truly know what that purpose will be. We must wait for and hope for the implantation of thought that gestates into an idea, that labors into activity and finally is birthed into reality.

Here's some "womanly" information you may not want to know the details of: Some women can "tell" when they are ovulating. They experience some aching, some cramping, moodiness and maybe some spotting. Yuck.

But I say, there is the same kind of discomfort when the seed of purpose is ripening as well.

I was going through this pre-cycle discomfort for a while prior to attending a business seminar in Dallas, TX this past April. And without knowing it - my formerly barren womb of opportunity was actually ovulating my seed of purpose. One thing led to another and wham, bam thank you ma'am - two weeks later I'm waiting on a phone call like waiting on a pregnancy test. Let me back up a moment.

I must confess that when in Dallas I did not fall in love with my future - I did not get a quickie marriage to my purpose. No... instead it was as if I had an illicit one-night-stand weekend! Truth be told, it was as if I had to sneak around whenever I mentioned this possible purpose. It was frowned upon as a no-no and if I am to continue with the analogy, it was as if the leaders of this conference were arranging a marriage for me and were suggesting adoption for my barren womb of purpose. Oh, but the weekend was filled with such passion and emotion and excitement that I could not be lured away from my two-night affair with destiny.

Like an adoptive mother waiting to be matched, I waited for two-weeks for that call that would confirm my marriage and adoption. But admittedly, while I waited... I took care, and continued to do all the right things... just in case I was truly "pregnant" with truth.

Sure enough, days before the call my purpose test turned positive - the seed of truth had ripened, been fertilized, implanted and had begun it's quiet gestation. Weeks later, like a trip to the doctor, a local prophet whom I had only met a few times confirmed my "pregnancy" by confirming my purpose with such accuracy there was no more denying my truth.

It has been a short gestation, but it has not been without it's morning sickness, anticipation, anxiety, excitement and glorious joy at the mere thought of my future.

And now I am proud to say that on this Friday I am scheduled for a Cesarean - a forced birth of purpose, if you will. And I cannot wait! Trust me, I know that after this purpose is born there will still be all the ups and downs of parenting responsibility to contend with. My new "baby" will get sick and will have growth spurts. My new "baby" will grow and get stronger, maybe get ornery, will try to give me trouble and will always be a joy.

It is impossible to envision exactly what my new purpose will look like, but I have a pretty good idea and I am already in love! But come this Friday all things will change as I finally give birth and am able to properly parent my Presidential purpose.

I will upload a birth announcement with pictures of my new baby...

Just Shy; Not Shy!

2008-05-04T17:28:00.001-07:00

Can you believe it!?

It is just shy of 6 months since my last post.

And boy, oh boy! So much has happened, so much has changed, so much is going on!

First let me say, what you are about to read is the manifestation of God at work! It is the realization of answered prayer and it is the premonition of FANTASTIC things to come!

So, I finished T.D. Jake's "Reposition Yourself" and it was the impetus for everything that has happened since then. It is also the reason you can disregard everything else written in my post 6 months ago!

1) On Nov. 17 the DCS, Inc. auxiliary company Jubilation! Weddings & Events did a 30/50 birthday party for a miserable client and her niece who both got drunk, got mean, got violent and passed out. Consequently the client did not pay the balance of her bill - $1000 - for 3 months, until I excused her of her debt and prayed for the unhappiness in her and her family's lives. Subsequently I have laid to rest that business venture. Not because of the client but because working during the prime hours I want to spend with my son is not the direction I want to move in.

2) During December my interim business with "Baby Signs, Inc." held a class of 3 adorable infants. One (who paid by check) dropped out inexplicably and the Destination Christian Services, Inc. merchant account would not accept payments from the other two who did complete* the class. Consequently I lost money on this class because of the rent I was paying for the facility and all the money spent on marketing (education) efforts. (*) One of my 2 students missed a class and car trouble, missing equipment and scheduling would not allow us to get a make up class rescheduled. Subsequently I have laid this business venture to rest. Not because of the clients, but because teaching infants to sign is definitely not the career I want to be known for at the end of my life.

3) Finally, the inherited 4-plex I was suffering with for almost 2 years, was sold! Praise God, hallelujah! We were able to refinance and afford our new house and set aside money for our retirement, J-man's college fund and make some investments as well. Consequently this also meant no more rent money coming in each month. And with no lucrative businesses desperation set in.

4) Just prior to finishing "Reposition Yourself" (after all of these circumstances had transpired) a girlfriend gave me Loral Langemeier's The Millionaire Maker's Guide to Building a Cash Machine for Life. Now this was what I had been repositioning myself for!

5) Long story short I devoured that book; devoured her 6 CD series "Expression of Your Power; devoured her first book "The Millionaire Maker"; attended her 2-day seminar in Dallas Texas and devoured 2 more of her CD series!

6) Since then I have changed! No more fear! Oh, trust me, it is GONE! I have a new mind-set, a new belief system, new goals, and a new plan for reaching those goals. I also have one less best friend; one new business partner, a husband who doesn't recognize nor understand his wife any longer; a toddler who is challenging the new me and is now in a new preschool, and a new professional mentor from The Family International Church in Pasadena, CA.

7) I also have new business ventures and activities. I have a new monthly column in The Family International Church newsletter - even though I do not attend the church! I have a new local business directory for minority & women owned businesses. I have a new speaking career in the works and I have a host of new literature I am currently finishing up and will be publishing between now and December of 2008 so I can launch a book tour and women's summit in 2009!

8) I have new websites coming - stay tuned. Right now you can check out www.hip2give.ning.com and soon there will be www.hipgiver.com and www.books4yourdestiny.com as well as the site for my inspirational speaking and women's summits: www.getliferightnow.com. Get ready world... big things are coming.

9) I have no limit thinking and a new joy in my life and a message that will renew and transform the hearts and minds of women everywhere. Believers shall not be deceived so long as I can help it! I have a message; I have hope and I have a vision. "Man devises his plan, but God directs his steps" Proverbs 16:3

10) Get ready world... big things are coming and I am no longer shy to say it!

It's Here: I'm Here.

2007-11-12T07:27:00.000-08:00

I've been reading T.D. Jakes' "Repositioning Yourself" - I just started.

In reading it so far, I've been faced with two areas of thought.

On the one hand, I'm really proud of myself for what I've accomplished and how much I've done.

On the other hand, I am both saddened and energized at the thought of finally overcoming my barriers of fear! If I had been living so boldly at my first revelation of fear - truly bold and not hesitantly bold - how much more would I have accomplished? How much more can I accomplish and when can I once and for all eradicate the fear that is left??

My angst and anxiousness over this fear is like finding a cancerous lump just below the surface of my skin: I can feel it. I know it must come out. I want it out so badly I would cut it out myself if it weren't for the fear of pain or damage to myself.

Which is more palpable? The fear of the cancer of fear? The pain and damage of removing it myself? Or the fear that I will not find someone to do it for me in time - has it already spread; latching on to far too many areas of my life to actually remove it all?

I ask these questions because on the heels of excitement I feel the fear lingering; hovering; like a vulture; waiting for the failure so it can pounce, attack and feed on my moment of weakness.

Here I am.

I am living the life of my plans!!

(1) The settlement and the inheritance are finally about to come to a close. I will be able to pay my bills, pay the house, pay off the last of my debt and save for mine and my families futures.

(2) I am working that flexible, fun, daily "job" and once I begin to meet my monthly minimum, I will be able to cover our basic needs and the current bills, groceries, gas and so forth.

(3) I have received leads and a gig for my company. It is slowly growing and will help provide more for our daily needs as well as assist in the growth of the parent organization.

(4) I am boldly building the organization. Stepping out on faith and pushing it towards the goals that exist for it. I am pushing myself towards the goals I have placed on myself in order to bring this organization truly to a viable, fruit-bearing, fruition.

(5) And by pushing myself to do this I have completed some writing and will complete more and have actually finished the calendar fundraiser - my first published literary work of art.

It is Here.

And it is available now for sale: The 2008 Destination Inspiration "What If" Wall Calendar

So, if it is here, and I am here - both of us exactly where I'd like us to be. And more prayerfully, exactly where the Lord intends for us to be. Which means He has been answering my prayers for Proverbs 16:9 "Man devises his plan, but the Lord directs his steps." Yea, me!

And that is why the fear is hovering like a vulture. "For God has not given the spirit of fear; but of POWER, and of LOVE and of a SOUND MIND."

It is the enemy that manufactures my fear and on the tail of my POWER through Christ, he launches a valiant and re-energized attempt to make me think the Lord doesn't love me enough to continue to answer, to bless, to guide me through to the end I foresee and therefore disrupting my peace of mind and effectively undermining and undercutting my power.

Shame, shame. Shame on me. Shame on fear. I must cut you out with a dull butter knife and praise the Lord almighty for the pain and the damage - knowing that it is through His strength that I will prevail!

I am prevailing!

It's Coming!

2007-10-30T00:09:00.000-07:00

Oh, Hallelujah!

Remember me saying I'm gettin' it done, y'all?

Here it is for real - it's coming...

The 2008 Destination Inspiration "What If" Wall Calendar.

It's filled with incredible photography - not stock photos - real pictures taken by friends, family and... me. Like this one taken from the front seat of my mother's car while she was driving my son and me to the Sacramento airport.

And, it's got inspirational, scripture related poetry written by... me.

It will be the debut release from Destination Publications - a Destination Christian Services, Inc. auxiliary company. And it will be the 2007 fundraising item. Last year I made inspirational T-shirts and everyone who donated got one. We raised enough money to distribute blankets and personal care kits to teens at a local faith-based homeless shelter.

This year proceeds from our $20 calendar sales will go towards two things: 1) the implementation of our online academy, and 2) sponsoring 9-15 youth at a Christian youth golf clinic in December. Check back here later to find out more!

If any of you are pray-ers, pray for the implementation of the clinic. Or (shameless plug) order a calendar. They will be available for sale November 2nd... Oh, heck - why am I blogging? I've got more work to do!

(I'm gettin' it done y'all!)

Fear No Evil

2007-10-10T16:02:00.000-07:00

Have we talked about fear?

It permeates like a bad smell you can't find.

You rampage through the garbage of your life - tossing out all that offends.

And the fear, like a bad smell, lingers...

You rampage on a cleaning binge, straightening up all that might be out of sorts.

And the fear, like a bad smell, rises above your efforts.

It hinders you.

It is an obstacle to interpersonal relationships.

It greets you at the door of each new day.

It wakes you in the night, disrupting peace and sleep.

It consumes you.

And it forces you towards one of two choices...

1) Desensitize; ignore and accept or
2) Recognize; eradicate and learn

Everyday I struggle to recognize the fear when it crops up in a new form;
Everyday I struggle to remember to eradicate the fear before it seeps deeper;
Everyday I struggle to learn how the fear began and keep it from coming back;

Everyday I smell the fear: foul, offensive and evil-
And everyday I'll scrub with the bleaching power of the spirit.

With the spirit, I'll fear no evil.

Doin' Thangs

2007-09-28T21:21:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm doin' thangs y'all.
Planning, doing, talking, and asking.

I'm gettin' it done y'all.
Pass or fail, front and center, hiding no more.

I'm doin' it, and doin' it and doin' it - well...

I've set dates
I've written letters
I've had meetings
I've typed minutes
I've made plans
I've discussed plans
I've made programs
I've made contacts
I've written documents
I've updated webs

I still will make more contacts
I still will write more letters
I still will publish items
I still will pursue work
I still will pursue programs
I still will make plans
I still will have meetings
I still will follow through
I still will find a way

I'm handlin' biz'ness y'all
Gettin' it done.

Absent Yes; Absence No

2007-09-28T08:55:00.000-07:00

So, I told you I was absent: disconnected from the source.

And I told I you I would fear no more and live my life with force.

I told you I had left a gap in communication and time

And how with determination I would finally claim what's mine.

What's mine is not material, but my true and spiritual gift

A choice to be and do and give and mend my inner rift

And so I did connect and re-align myself with life

To concentrate on God and child and work, and being a wife

And the blessings have been coming steady and true

Blessings not material but in accomplishing all I do

So while I've still been absent, my absence is no more

I took my own advice and walked boldly through my door

Of busy hopes and tangible dreams from day to day to day

Just check my next blog, you'll see I've got so much more to say

Absence; The Absence

2007-08-24T16:52:00.000-07:00

I've been absent far too long.

From this blog. From my life. From the Source.
From connecting with anyone outside of me.
From connecting with the power of the spirit within me.

Busy.
So busy.
Too busy connecting with fear.

Again.
And again I say, "Fear not."

Yesterday I awoke and determined I was tired. Emotionally and physically tired.
And I felt I had so many things I wanted to do; should do; and needed to do and had no time, nor the energy in which to do anything. And yet, hadn't I been busy doing something?

Then came a deeper dawning of a previous revelation: not only had some of the old fears crept subconsciously back in, but I instantly identified another aspect of my fear. And it suddenly seemed so pointless, useless, and an insult to the God who created me to be and do all the things I want to; should do and need to do.

My life is going to end one day just like everyone else's. And when it does, what will I have to account for before my Lord? And what will my son have to remember me by when I'm gone? He will not know my efforts; my desires or my dreams. He will only know the things I left behind - finished or not.

And so why shouldn't I boldly claim the power the Lord promises to me? Why shouldn't I step madly into the world, open my mouth and profess with out fear of recrimination, reproof or disdain, the purposes so dear to me?

Let them recriminate, reprove or disdain... what? My favor is in the eyes of the Lord.

And that evening a non-believing friend told me I was "glowing." Ha! Go figure! I boldly told him why. And he openly agreed that was probably a good reason for the glow.

And so, now continues the beginning of the daily transformation of what has always been.

I am a 41 year old wife, mother of a 2 year-old son and struggling entrepreneur.
I have two businesses that are barely active; I have two other businesses that are sadly inactive; I am a writer, attempting to become an author and I still manage to come up with at least one new idea or project every single day.

And, I am the President and Founder of a God-gifted vision.

Pray for me that I will soon be able to say - I am connected, confident and fearless too. Absent no more.

Black Butterfly

2007-07-18T07:14:00.000-07:00

Today I saw the biggest butterfly I have ever seen. And of course, since I've not really seen a multitude of butterflies in my life, the size ratio of what I have seen compared to this one is extreme.

I can truly say that I have seen average sized butterflies and small butterflies and up until now, I would have said I had seen a large one (or two) as well. And that the larger ones were not necessarily that much larger than most, nor were they particularly more difficult to find than the others.

This gorgeous creature was probably 3 1/2 maybe even 4 inches tall with her wings fairly straight up and the width of her wings was about 3 inches at their widest.

And she had landed before me. And she didn't move. And she was all black with golden yellow markings and a yellow body.

And it was significant to me in an instant.

In the midst of a dirty street, on a not particularly bright and "beautiful" day, surrounded by (of all things) horse droppings - there was beauty. God's big, magnanimous beauty - in quiet, inconsequential peace, waiting to be enjoyed.

And I saw this butterfly as my blessings - my unfulfilled blessings and my yet as unanswered prayers.

She was as big as all my hopes and as extraordinary as all my dreams. And she had no fear. And she was joy and hope and beauty in the midst of all that was dirty and ugly.

And I took her as a sign - a sign I pray is true - I sign I pray I can hold on to...

That today is the beginning of all my biggest blessings come true.

Today is the beginning of all my biggest dreams come to fruition.

Today may have started in a very insignificant manner, and the mundane of today's activities may see the sun set equally as insignificant. But somewhere, somehow I am holding dear that today is the beginning of completion.

Today I saw the biggest butterfly I have ever seen.

I Shall Not Be Moved...

2007-07-10T22:40:00.000-07:00

The enemy is fighting back today.

I've been feeling good, motivated and excited. I'm getting ready to publish the first literary works and products for the organization. Wow, a true and exciting accomplishment! And I'm so close, praising God I can see this portion of the dream coming to fruition.

The enemy does not want to see me overcome and walk in His will. He's fighting back today. Sparing like a desperate has-been, trying to take the up-and-coming rookie off guard. He's pulling big punches and hitting below the belt.

Product Printing Obstacles
Fussy Baby Blues
Fighting Unfair Hubby
My Mom's Denial Downer
Crying Headache Hurting
Toddler Tantrum Trouble
Self-Doubt Dilemma

Recognize. Press On. Forgive. Move On. Keep on, keeping on. Hold On.

The Spokesman Formerly Known As...

2007-07-07T22:20:00.000-07:00

I did it.

I wrote the letter.

I published the samples.

I compiled the items.

I put them in an envelope.

I found AN address.

I made a label.

I put on postage.

I said a prayer...

And I released that package into the wild, crazy, what-are-you-thinking, unknown realm of potential invisibility; embarrassment or worse; acceptance - that is currently known as: the mailbox.

"Gideon - this is my fleece."

I actually did it.
7/7/7

Destiny's Journey

2007-07-03T14:57:00.000-07:00

Thank you for taking the time to comment.

Many blessings,
~Dez

Scriptures

2007-06-03T20:10:00.000-07:00

For the past five years now I have been living on scriptures like air to breathe, water to thrive and a floatation device to survive.

Sustaining me; engaging me; pertaining specifically to me.

Reminding me, denying me, aligning me with hope.

For five years now I've been living on scriptures: like air, like water, like floating...

For GOD has not given the SPIRIT of Fear, but of POWER and of LOVE and of a SOUND MIND. Leaving behind the same old doubts and boughts of uncertainty.

Pushing myself with power, loving my self anew - each and every hour, reminding my mind it's Ok. Everything will be OK.

For five years now I've been living on scriptures: breathing, thriving, surviving...

A [Woman's] heart devises [her] plan: but the LORD directs [her] steps. All bets are off, though I may be off in thinking I'll pull this off, I'm pushing on and on and on to the end.

Make plain my plan, don't stray my steps: adhere, revere, sincerely refraining from fear.

For five years now and hope for five more - No Fear, FEAR NOT. Love me, Love me NOT, strength like a boy scout square knot, I'll NOT give into to the knots within my stomach from fear, FEAR NOT.

For five years now and hope for five more - the plan, the steps, like a staircase up; baby steps, step up, step it up a notch; the goal, the dream, that seems undoable: undone; the way and the plan to final completion.

(II Timothy 1: 7/Proverbs 16:9)

"The Plan"

2006-01-05T13:27:00.000-08:00

These are the confessions of a talented, hard-working, creative genius with purpose (formerly known as an irresponsible, flaky and distracted "mentally gifted minor" with so much potential).

I'm putting this plan out into the world, out into the "universe" and laying it all in God's hands. I am now accountable if only to the imaginary few whom I believe will see and read this post.

I will pursue all efforts to secure my settlement and the sale of my property in order that I can pay off the final amounts of all my outstanding debt so that I can be emotionally and financially free to...
...work hard at my creative, flexible "job" in order to pay my regular, minimum monthly household expenditures of $1000 and have the time and ability to...
...build my "career" and entrepreneurial endeavors so that I will have the foundation and finances necessary to...
...pursue all necessary speaking engagements, pilot programs and fund-raising opportunities that would lay the ground work for and...
...establish the ultimate goal of opening the Destination Christian Arts Academy, its auxiliaries and all the associated D.R.E.A.M. programs.

Proverbs 16:9 "Man devises his plan, but the Lord directs his steps."

The Problem

2005-07-10T16:32:00.000-07:00

I was afraid. I was fragile. I was insecure. I was worried.
(The Lord has not given the spirit of FEAR, but of Power and of Love and of a Sound Mind)

I was afraid of the awesome tasks before me. I was afraid of what the world might think of me. I was afraid of condemnation. I was afraid of failure. I was afraid of success. Worse - I was afraid of me.

The Lord has not given the spirit of Fear.

I was so fragile and weak. I blew in the direction of every show of support. I tried to please. I tried to appease. I tried with no strength to do, to speak up, to stand up and so I shut up and put up with and followed every direction offered as a show of support.

POWER

I was insecure and lacked the confidence of my own convictions. How could I convince others of this great idea when I was so unsure of it? How could I present this idea as memorable and worthwhile when I was too busy asking if it was instead of delivering it as such. Who else would embrace this venture if I was too ashamed to embrace it myself?

LOVE

I was consumed with worry. What would everyone think? What if I fell flat on my face? What if I convinced everyone of this great idea that turned out not to be so great? What if this wasn't really the will of God? What if I really couldn't do what I really wanted to do? What if I couldn't convince anyone that this was my purpose and a good purpose for them too? Apparently I wasn't, I hadn't, I didn't.

SOUND MIND

And so I perpetuated my own fears, my own weakness, my own insecurities and my own anxiety.

I was afraid of what my family would think of me and so my family was fearful for me.
I was weak and weary and so the lawyer stepped in and was strong for me.
I was insecure and dependant on my friends and so my friends enabled me out of love.
I was worried about the future of this organization and so all progress stopped.

For One Whole Year.

But GOD has not given the SPIRIT of fear but of POWER and of LOVE and of a SOUND MIND

Now I am no longer afraid, but stepping out on faith - my family is still fearful of my failure.
Now I am strengthened like the wings of eagles - but the lawyer still sees me as weak and fragile.
Now I am assured of my purpose in life - by my friends still struggle to see my worth.
Now I am anxious to get this thing going - "the blessings of the Lord come with ease and peacefulness."

Peace, love and happiness? Yes...
POWER, LOVE and a SOUND MIND

The History

2004-07-10T15:08:00.000-07:00

Since its inception in 2003, Destination Christian Services, Inc. has had a rocky if not stoic onset.

I realize it is because I am doing it all by myself.

Initially I had to choose several names to be officers on the Articles of Incorporation. I tried to choose names of individuals who love me, supported me and who may at one point be willing to participate in this project with me.

I chose husband, brother-in-law (BIL), 2 best friends and 1 friend and her husband. The friend and her husband were apparently not friends and we did not see eye-to-eye and so, they were the first to go. Replaced with Godsister and a male friend of BIL who had expressed a deep belief in Christ. Godsister lives a deep belief in Christ and moved to Washington to become a teacher at a Christian school. She is the second to go. She is replaced by BIL's girlfriend who expressed a deep desire to one day work with kids in the area of dance. BIL's male friend is unreachable - did he read packet? I don't know. Did he receive emails? I don't know. Talk to him in person? "Yeah, yeah - let's get together and you can tell me what it's all about." Read the packet... read the email. Never mind. He was the third to go. Replaced with a tennis student of the hubby who has a growing belief in Christ. BIL's girlfriend quits dancing and gets a job in the health field.

Am I really doing this all by myself?

The hubby couldn't tell you anything about this organization - probably not even the name. The BIL couldn't tell you anything about this organization - not even the name. BIL's girlfriend couldn't tell you anything about this organization - definitely not even the name! 2 best friends, probably would try to tell you a little about this organization and would try to remember the name - but could not. They both have supported individual activities as best they could. Yikes! There was an Auntie too... where is Auntie? We've both forgotten about each other. The hubby's student probably would be an excellent member if I had something strong enough for her to be a member of. I have no active Board of Directors.

I am really doing this all by myself.

When you incorporate, the government gives you approximately 2 years before they take a look to see that you are not trying to fraud the system. If you are a non-profit they may give you a little leeway on time, but if they think you are defrauding the system financially, the penalties are steep. I decide I'd better apply for my non-profit status before they take a look and decide I need an audit. I pay a lawyer $1000 to take a look at my organizational structure and tell me if it's a viable venture and to help me apply for the 501.c3 status. That's all.

The lawyer - a very cool young woman - takes my $1000 and says that for that cost (even though she ordinarily charges $250 an hour) she will help me with the 501.c3 application, hire an accountant for the financial information, train my Board of Directors and... by the way, if I DON'T pursue this organization I am "doing myself and the world a great disservice." I am totally smitten and my fragile, damaged, insecure ego is boosted right over the last edge of confidence obstacle I had. Apparently it must have for her too.

Because as I started growing and becoming more confident, so did she! She began to instruct me, give me homework and check up on me. Call these people, ask them these questions. Look up this website, send them this email, create this program and enlist these people. Yea, OK. I mean, she was helping, right? She was supporting, right? She was motivating me, right? She was giving me the (basically free) benefit of all her experience, right? Right. Or so I thought.

However, she was not... reading any of the information I sent her on the organization as it was currently designed. She was not at all doing any of the work on, nor had she even read the 501.c3 application. She could not answer any of my questions on the application and, I could not follow through with the accountant until I got answers to some of the previous questions. She did not help with the application. Finally, she could not, or would not provide training to the Board in the format in which they were already used to dealing with DCS. She wanted a face to face. Nope - won't happen. She wanted a video conference. Ha! Fat chance. She wanted a telephone conference call. Nice try. How about email and back it up with a mailed copy? Nope. No can do. Is she the 4th to go?

May as well, I seem to be doing this all by myself.

I held my first fund-raiser. Wow, I did it all by myself! My first accomplishment in this crazy venture. I wanted to hold a poetry contest for teens. No poets submitted. So, I requested of my BoD to turn in their favorite, most inspirational scripture. Only a few responded. So I enlisted friends, other family and Mom & Dad. I was intent on getting 12 scriptures. I finally did, including my own and created the official "Destination Inspiration" T-shirt. It was a giveaway for donations. The online, weekend event commenced. Mom & Dad weighed in, Aunts & Uncles weighed in. Cousins weighed in. 1 (best friend) Board Member weighed in. Grand total: $500. A very good showing for a first fund-raiser... right?

Right. T-shirts cost: $350; spent $100 to buy items for 20 personal care kits and distributed them to a teen homeless shelter. Probably spent the last $50 on postage to send each person who donated as well as each board member (and the lawyer) a T-shirt. I even sent the former friends/former board members t-shirts. Thanks for your previous "service" - look what I'm accomplishing all by myself.

I am doing this all by myself.

Forget the approval of former friends. Forget the support of current friends. Forget the skepticism of family. Forget the lawyer and all those satellite programs and suggestions. Forget and get a new BoD!

I am doing this by myself! That's The Problem... I am doing this all by myself.

"The Accomplishment"

2003-01-05T13:56:00.000-08:00

Proverbs 13:12 & 19a: "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. A desire accomplished is sweet to the soul;"

In December 2003, I boldly took the steps to incorporate a non-profit idea I'd had for years. I jumped into this corporation head first. It is so unlike me! Usually I test the water, stick in a toe and yank it out. Then wade to my ankle, shudder and jump right out. Only to repeat the process until finally submerged in the water. Not this time.

This time I took a deep breath and plunged right in. I got my articles of incorporation: Destination Christian Services, Inc. I established my business licenses and the DBA's for all corporate auxiliaries: Jubilation! Full-Services Weddings & Events; Destination Publications; Mommy's Happy Helpers and more. I then got to work on and posted all the associated web pages: www.dcscompanies.com; www.destinationchristianservices.net; www.jubilationparties.com and www.mommyshappyhelpers.com. I got checking accounts, I got business cards, I made all my business documents and established advertising. All of it WAY... TOO... SOON!

Only months before incorporating, I had finally determined this idea was truly the will of the Lord Almighty. Within hours of that determination, I finally accepted that this idea was more than the will of the Lord, but that it was my one true, God given purpose in life. And minutes after that acceptance I was rocked with the magnitude and specific details of that plan and just exactly what was God's intention for it all.

But in one small way, I knew that I needed to jump right in or I would find a way to procrastinate and never get it done. Now I must back-track, jump-ahead and scramble for a way to get it all done and reach my ultimate goal

This is my scattered plan for achieving that specific and detailed, mind-boggling, will-of-God goal - the purpose for my life.

Create and maintain all associated websites
Create and complete the academy curriculum
Create a sample lesson from the curriculum
Create and publish all manuals and associated documentation
Create and publish associated works for publication
Create and establish speeches and evangelistic engagements
Create and distribute all fund-raising related product
Create and administer all satellite programs
Create and maintain the online academy
Create and produce all fund-raising events
Create and utilize all scholarship programs
Create membership programs and establish a solid Board of Directors
Create and complete all necessary legal and financial documentation
Create and establish all sponsorship programs
Create and implement all student recruitment programs
Create and maintain all aspects of advertisement and networking
Create and continue; continue to create; create and complete.

II Corinthians 9:7-15 "Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work: (As it is written, He hath dispersed abroad; he hath given to the poor: his righteousness remaineth for ever. Now he that ministereth seed to the sower both minister bread for your food, and multiply your seed sown, and increase the fruits of your righteousness;) Being enriched in every thing to all bountifulness, which causeth through us thanksgiving to God. For the administration of this service not only supplieth the want of the saints, but is abundant also by many thanksgivings unto God; Whiles by the experiment of this ministration they glorify God for your professed subjection unto the gospel of Christ, and for your liberal distribution unto them, and unto all men; And by their prayer for you, which long after you for the exceeding grace of God in you. Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift."

Overcast Overview

2002-05-05T12:39:00.000-07:00

There is a well known phrase that begins: "The best laid plans..." Perhaps it is not so well known, because I can't remember the rest. Perhaps it is significantly related to the accomplishment of my plans that I can't remember the rest.

I have a plan on how to reach a goal and that particular goal has its own plan of accomplishment and an entirely separate plan of procedure.

All Clear?

For the purposes of this blog, I want to track the "The Plan" and "The Accomplishment" because "The Procedure" is already established and waiting for the rest to get a move on.

"The plan" is my life plan - my own individual goals, necessities and desires for how I want to structure my world.

"The Accomplishment" is my ultimate plan of attack for how I want to accomplish the ultimate goal included in "The Plan."

Together, these two plans encompass the journey I've referred to in "Destiny's Journey." And this blog is the daily record and accountability of actions taken that are related to those two plans.

All clear?

Here's the plan for this blog...

To be an outlet of creative expression as I follow through with my plans.
To be a public, legitimizing, undeniable record of my dreams, goals and plans
To be a daily accountability structure for getting things done and accomplishing all plans
To be an avenue of networking all aspects of my plans with other, like-minded plans and/or planners.

In that order.

All Clear? Yeah, me either.

In The Beginning...

2001-06-03T23:27:00.000-07:00

In the beginning... more than just the words to the beginning of the Bible, these are also the words to the beginning of one of my favorite songs. A song I performed back in the heyday of my life - like a has-been who dredges up stories of high school and that great pass, that great shot or that great prom as the highlight of their life.

I started out a singer, you see. The beginning of a me I'm still destined to be.

Back then the plan was to become a famous singer and then "they" would let me write and star in and do the soundtrack for my own movies.

I was multi-talented, multi-tasking and creative even then, but it was labeled as flaky, irresponsible, indecisive and flighty.

I began to buy the hype, believe the lies and diminish myself - striving or actually settling for security, safety and the slightest portion possible of what I was really capable.

You would have thought my environment breathed a sigh, finally I fit their box, stuck to their rules and maybe would now amount to something, anything really, because, as they acknowledged, I had so much talent, so much potential - I could do anything I wanted. Really?

That's not what I wanted! And like the opposite ends of a magnet - the friction, discord and dissatisfaction was too much for me; too much for them; and simply just too much.

And so I finally accepted me; learned to love me and re-prioritized the me I wanted me to be. I accepted my purpose and set out on the path toward my destiny. On the path to Destiny. The me, I was concealing was now a me living out loud. A me they refuse to acknowledge or understand.

I gathered up all my talents, abilities and skills and carried them into the core of me - straight into the very depths of Destiny to discover just what was my true destiny.

To be me. To give others all my missed opportunities. To teach teens how to live their own destinies. To recreate reality. To build an academy. To wake up a DREAM.

Like Noah and his arc I was given details, a design, specifications and goals. Given or got, made up or not, I had a plan. A wildly inconceivable, impossible plan.

Like Moses I was given a people with a task and a place and a message to lead them out. Given or got, made up or not, I could see a promised land. A wildly inconceivable, impossible to get to Promised Land.

And all by myself without one helping hand I've got to be strong and stand: on faith, on principle, on belief, on hope, on God - the way, the truth, the life. My foundation, my truth, my way and my life - that I can provide these kids with a foundation for their own truth and an ability to find a way to live their true purpose, their abundantly best life.

It started with an adamant joke of an idea for a small growing community. Don't build a library I thought at each sign for support on the corner posts. There's one so nearby that all the kids already utilize. Build instead a center, where kids can really commune and do the things they really like instead of just what adults decide is right.

This seed took root and grew deep and strong, drawing nourishment from the wellspring of life until finally the first leaves have appeared. It grows ever still and if this sapling can survive the coming storms, the trunk will then be strong enough to sustain and withhold. And the branches will spread and shed more seed, more shade, safety and protection. If only I can see it through to completion.

Blue Mood

2000-11-19T00:05:00.000-08:00

"A thousand years ago, i was born the essence of silence
I am the basis of grief, friend and sister to sadness
I live my own meaning, my fate, eternity
Folding within myself, I am, explicitly."
~Dez (circa - 1980)

For most of my life I have been blue.

I identify, recognize, associate and create in blue and hues thereof.

And like an original name meaning sorrow, somehow this blue has indeed enhanced, reflected and deflected my mood.

Self-portraits of tears still masked my true fears - "Why can't you draw yourself smiling, my Dear?"

Evolving in personal meaning like the varying definitions of truth, I move from mood to being. A state; a place; a way called safe, this color that is blue.
~Dez (circa - 1965-2005)

Is my destiny sorrow: my fate from day of birth?
To cry and grieve and smile through tears
and laugh remorse with no mirth?

Is my destiny sorrow: to live yet not complete?
To grow and change and learn of self,
with selfless meaning and no retreat?

I, myself am sorrow: and Destiny is told.
That through this life with heart and soul,
I'll sad with the happy 'til infinity is old.
~Dez (circa - 1990)

Destiny's Journey

2000-11-19T00:02:00.000-08:00

Some journeys are well traveled roads. Common, familiar and easy. We cruise along the path oblivious to the process as we habitually turn each corner, climb each hill and break each slope. Only to arrive, blink and wonder how we managed without incident or memory of the trip.

This journey - my journey - is not like that. This journey is one of reluctance, hesitance, unsurity, insecurity and yes, a moderate amount of fear.

As I open the window for you to view my progress, you will undoubtedly come to your own conclusion based upon the progress of your own journey - and your observations will be varied.

Some might say that I am making slow but steady progress toward a clear destination. Others may say that I am floundering and wandering aimlessly down a muddy road with too many directions to choose from.

I say my journey has just begun, although it started more than 10 years ago. I say I still have such a long, long way to go, although I am teetering on the precipice of completion. I say the journey has made me weary, leery and weak, although I trudge on with a strength and endurance that is beyond me. I say the path is muddy, with many obstacles, directions and difficulties still yet to come. However, my destination is clear - crazy, unimaginable, overwhelming and clear.

When this path first appeared it was like a hazy, dirt road on a foggy day. I peered at it without knowing what it was or where it was going - then tried to ignore it as inconsequential. When the path persisted I joked as to where it might lead, then still tried to dismiss it as a path not meant for me.

It was years before the view of the path cleared and I was able to see the destination more clearly. It was absurd to think that the reality of where this path could end up would be in a place far more outlandish than even my most absurd imaginings! OK, maybe - just maybe this path ended up in a very good place - but a place still not meant for me. Definitely not me.

Why not me? Who else but me, since I was the only one to see? Please, Dear God, not me! Yes, me. This path was meant for me.

And so I watched it, argued with it, denied it and tried to imagine a life without pursuing it.

Four - no five, has it already been five? Five years ago I accepted it. I stuck out a big toe like testing the cold water of a pool - then yanked my foot back like I so often would. I wrote about it, dreamed about it, and tried it on for size in the privacy of my dressing room of life. And by the way, I still watched it, argued with it, denied it and tried to imagine a life without pursuing it.

Three - sorry, I forgot - Four years ago I made up my mind. I packed my bags, said good bye to the sanity and sanctuary of friends and family who always had thought they understood me, and I took my first hesitant and frightened step.

In these last four years I have walked, sometimes trotted, but never quite run toward a goal I think is crazy. I have stopped, I have even sat down and I have wistfully looked back to a time when I did not know and could not see what was meant for me.

But I will not stop. I packed my bags (all my baggage), and made up my mind. Armed with nothing but 2 scriptures and a great deal of hope, I continue to trudge on driven by the surity that if - just if - I happen to arrive at this awesome, fearsome destination, it will be extraordinary, phenomenal and inconceivably wonderful. This destination...

A destination, a journey to a place that is called destiny. My destiny. Destiny's purpose in life. My God given purpose.

Sometimes while we travel, we see another driver, glance in that direction and never take note or give them another thought. Perhaps that is how you will see me.

Sometimes we see another traveler and something catches our eye. We may watch a moment, muse a moment or even briefly wonder... Then they continue on their own separate way and thoughts of them fade as quickly as they do. Perhaps that will be how you see me.

Other times we get caught in traffic, bunched up with drivers because of fate. And whether we cruise along peacefully or struggle with road rage, we share a community of progress, each with our own destination. Perhaps that will be how you experience me.

And on rare occasion on our own individual roads of life, we travel a path where we encounter another driver - seemingly traveling to the same basic place. At times they follow us and then we follow them. We may take note of who they are and what they drive - possibly even read a licence plate. We'll share a moment or even a long while - silently and separately together, with maybe a glance, a smile or a brief a wave of acknowledgement. Perhaps that will be how you experience me.

I cannot say how long this path will be for me, so whether you glance and move on - never to take notice; or whether you wonder a moment at who I am and where I'm going; or whether you follow a while, smile and wave or better yet, if you decide to stay for the journey, I invite you to come along for the ride.